Cease and Desist

With less than 48 hours until 2012 arrives, here is a request.  Not having to hear these hackneyed expressions will produce much jubilation for this Queen. 

Just sayin’ – really?

LOL – Instead of texting or saying it, do it as boisterously and as frequently as possible.

Epic fail – A failure is a failure no matter how large, and in the truer sense, epic should not modify fail.  Check the meaning.

Viral – please! 

It is what it is – is not that apparent?

Sleep in – in what?  A tent?  Simply saying one is sleeping late will suffice and is correct.

Dead Presidents – a misnomer actually since not all gentleman featured on U.S. currency were presidents!

When it rains, it pours – not always.  (My students should recognize this one and be able to explain it!)

Bedazzled (The Tuesday Haiku)

Now that the holiday season is once again here, this was my experience on Sunday.  Enjoy.

Gifts in abundance.
Paper ripped; boxes opened.
Smiles light the room.  

9125 days

 

I couldn't resist posting this error, which I found on an Internet news site.  Technology truly is exciting when women can carry and give birth to inanimate objects for this long!

 

 

A 76-year-old British woman recently had a pen removed from her stomach, and doctors were shocked to discover that after 25 years of gestation the pen still works.

Detour

The Tuesday Haiku is taking a detour this week to make way for this lovely limerick to adorn the page.  Let me preface this post by saying that it is fictional (hmm...), and the rhyme scheme is indeed correct.  There are two pronunciations for the final word.  In this case, place the stress on the second syllable.  Shame on you for thinking I'd use lexemes incorrectly.

There is a young woman named Lola.
Who often imbibes rum and cola.
She started her blog
After she was deep-sixed by a frog.
Now she writes while traveling by gondola.

Endings

In the hubbub that characterizes the end of a college semester, I am witness to many occurrences, some of which are the sources for this Tuesday Haiku.  Enjoy!

Books sold or traded.

Exams prepped for and taken.

Belongings are packed. 

Did not seek, but this Grammar Gal did find

I was not looking for these blunders.  They found their way to me.  The members of my royal court know that it would be remiss of me if I did not report them as such.  


From a composition-book publishing company:  Our title reflects the reality that today everyone with a computer can publish what they write.  


From my local newspaper:  Dorothy Askew-Sawyer, director of the St. Vincent de Paul of Baltimore's Beans and Bread Center, behind her at left, stands where the center plans to expand, if neighbors concerned about its drawing more needy people from all over the city can't stop it. 


From a news Web site:  Amanda Knox hires a US lawyer searching for a book deal.


A simple edit could have avoided these glitches.  It seems my work will never be completed.  *sigh*

20,000 Leagues under...the Tuesday Haiku

Black ink; white paper.
I swim in a lettered sea.
Aiming for low tide.

Befuddled

My mind is a bit loopy of late since I'm buried waist-deep in student essays.  However, that hasn't stopped me from this confusion.  

Why are bologna, salami, and provolone cheese round but bread is square?   The final product is rather odd and not at all visually appealing.

Why is it called trimming the tree?  The object should be to decorate not cut.

Why is something called a drive-through when one has to stop at the window?   Brakes need not be applied.